The random misadventures of a (formerly)Single Super Mom

I have written multiple times about how amazing of an organization FIRST is, and how I have seen first hand how it can impact the entire trajectory of a child's life. Last year, I was invited to become a member of of a FIRST Robotics Competition Black Mentor Advisory Group. It is one of the only, if not the only organization of its kind in the United States. It is no secret that there is a distinct lack of Black representation in STEM and other professional areas. There are a couple of hundred FRC Mentors in North Carolina alone, and I would say about 10% of them are Black. We had a virtual meeting recently and the council head, who is White, and one of the staunchest allies I have ever met in my life, told us a story about a colleague who ran a robotics event at a school in North Carolina. There was a young Black girl in the group and when asked if she wanted to participate, she said "she couldn't." And when the program lead, who is White said that she could do anyth...

As a little girl, I was a superhero fanatic. I watched Wonder Woman, the Super Friends and every hero show I could.  I started collecting comics when I was about 15, and still have a huge box of them in my closet.  Wonder Woman was my favorite from the beginning, and she still is. Superman is a close second. The very first comic book I bought with my own money was an issue of the Teen Titans, and that was the first time I saw a Black female comic character. Bumblebee was introduced in 1976, and the name "Melissa" means "Honeybee", so I was absolutely entranced. Storm from the X-Men was a close second, as I admired her strength and intelligence as well as the bad ass way she delivered a beat down. Soon after I discovered that my ultimate superhero, Wonder Woman, had a Black twin sister named Nubia, who was sculpted from Black Clay as Diana was formed from White Clay.  Bumblebee courtesy of DC Universe Comic strips were the first to introduce Black characters , but t...

I grew up in the North, the Midwest specifically, but always knew of my roots and my family that lived down south. I heard the stories of the conditions that my father had to face while trying to go to school in Morgan City, Louisiana. The struggles of generation upon generation of family members and the racism and hatred they faced. The injustices that were done to them. And the triumphs as they succeeded and overcame.  When I told my mother 20 years ago that I was moving to the south, she was genuinely afraid for me, because the perception of the world down here is very scary sometimes.  I've lived in North Carolina for 20 years, and until a few years ago I hadn't really traveled around the area.  Most of my family still lived up north, so time off was spent visiting them. My trips to Georgia consisted of going to the airport, South Carolina was Myrtle Beach, and that's basically it. My husband is a native Californian and a huge history buff that has been down here long...

With all of the racial tension so prevalent in the world today I had to sit and ask myself.  What the hell?  What are we going to do about it?  How do we fix it?  How do we change it? The simple answer is, I don't know.  I know what I was taught in my home.  I know what my mother and my grandmother and great grandmother taught me.  I know what I taught my children.  I remember the stories that I was told by my elders growing up.  The stories of segregation and fear. The stories of being treated "less".  Of having to work harder to be better to overcome. A very good friend of mine posted something on Facebook that resonated with me.  Because she's 100% right.  I have endured years and years of " microaggressions " and back handed comments because I'm (blank) for a black girl. My name is Melissa.  Non-threatening.  It's a White girl name.  My co-worker, whom I love dearly has the name Duwana.  She's Whit...

During a meeting in Hayneyville, Alabama, on March 1, 1965 King inquired about voter registration procedures but Registrar Carl Golson told him "It's none of your business." HORACE CORT / AP Today is MLK day in the US, and the day that social media timelines are invariably flooded with quotes for peace and understanding by the late Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.  However, most of those quotes are just pieces of a greater picture, and people do not truly understand the entirety of them. Dr. King has been " softened " into a much more palatable icon for those who he made so uncomfortable in the past.  He was radical. He was reactionary. He was revolutionary. He was not all "let's hold hand in a circle and sing". He was ready to fight and break laws when necessary. His views on nonviolence have been grossly distorted over the years. The incidents in this country over the past year have severely underlined the lack of racial understanding and harmony we ha...

Did you know that Black women are over 1.5 times more likely to die from cervical cancer than White women? And over 200% more likely to die from complications due to childbirth? Can you imagine being a Black or Brown woman and going to the hospital to get your appendix removed...and finding out that the government and your doctor sterilized you without your consent? African-American patients tend to receive lower-quality health services, including for cancer, H.I.V., prenatal care and preventive care, vast research shows. The dirty and sordid history of women's health in this country is terrifying and appalling. Dr. J Marion Sims, called the "Father of Modern Gynecology", was a pioneering physician and slave owner in the 1800's. During that time, Blacks were still thought to be little more than "animals", and ostensibly Black women didn't feel pain. He used enslaved Black women for countless experiments without their consent, during a time when Women...

I recently had a conversation with a very dear friend of mine who has been a nurse for over 20 years.  She was taking a break from Social Media due to a lot of different factors, but I reached out to her to see if she was okay.   She told me that she'd heard over and over during the years from Black patients, "I don't trust doctors", and she couldn't figure out why.  Why would you not trust the people that are supposed to keep you healthy and help you when you're sick?  And that would make sense under most circumstances.  However, since the slave times, there has been a lack of regard for the health of Blacks in this country, and it hasn't changed.  From food deserts to disdain from providers to the root of so many health problems for Blacks..it's a bitter pill to swallow.  Currently we are seeing extremely disproportionate numbers of COVID positive patients in the Black community.  For the first time, people are asking "why?" and they are fl...