I'm a proud mama today.....
My son was always the "young" one. He made the cutoff to start kindergarten by about 2 weeks. I considered holding him out, or "redshirting" him, but life got in the way. I got the news that my then husband wanted a divorce, and I needed to get a job. My days as a stay at home mom were over. I wouldn't have traded them for the world.
He started to struggle in school in first grade. I attributed it to him being "immature". By third grade, his self esteem had started to suffer. My daughter is one of those "natural learners". Things come so easily to her. She was that straight A student without even trying. I'd get so heartbroken when he'd come home and I'd ask him how he did on a spelling test, or a math test; and he'd get this huge grin on his face and tell me "I think I did good this time mom!". And invariably, the test would come back with less than stellar results. Report card days were the worst. My daughter would come home with perfect grades. My son, however, would come home depressed and sad, and ask me "do you love Jordyn more because she's the smart one? " "do you love me even though I'm stupid?" I couldn't handle it.
I finally bit the bullet and acknowledged what I had suspected all along. I thought my son might suffer from ADD. I fought it as long as I could. I know so many kids are misdiagnosed, and overmedicated...that I didn't want to be one of "those" mothers that wanted a zombie for a kid, instead of someone a little more spirited. I had him assessed, and spoke at length with his doctor. I wanted him to still be my boy, just my boy who could sit still in class, not play with the insides of his desk drawer while everyone else was listening to the teacher, stay in his seat, keep from blurting out answers, and slow down long enough to focus. His father categorically disagreed with me. He thought his issues could be solved with Tae Kwon Do classes, not medicine. ADD is something that is so often labled as something it's not. However, when you are truly one of those people who try as hard as they can to stick to one task, to not procrastinate, to stay where they're put... We decided on the medicine to try, and with much trepidation, began treating him.
To say that it was night and day was an understatement. My boy that had such focus troubles went from a C/D student, to an A/B honor roll student in 9 weeks time. I'll never forget the look on his face when he brought home that report card. It was like Christmas morning after Santa came. His teacher was amazed at the difference him. We still had our bumps, but it was clear that we were on the right track. He was lucky enough to get an amazing teacher in 4th grade, and when I found out she was moving up to teach 5th grade, I lobbied as hard as I could to get him into her class again. 5th grade found him hitting his stride even more, even as my anxiety started to build at the thought of him going from the warm and fuzzy environment of elementary school, to the dog eat dog world of that purgatory called...Middle School. Middle school meant multiple teachers, switching classes, more homework....this is a boy that I have to remind to brush his teeth and put shoes on before he leaves the house...how on earth can I trust him in middle school???
This boy that I once caught drawing pictures inside all of the picture frame molding, and who scribbled his name in Sharpie marker all over his father's leather couch...tested into Honors level classes in middle school. Anxiety morphed into full fledged panic. Dear Lord....there was no way this kid could do this....
Progress reports came home this week....and to my everlasting shock and surprise, this boy, this child whose potential was locked inside his head while he struggled to get it out...is getting straight A's. I literally cried a little when I found out, because I knew it was always there...it just needed a different doorway to escape from. He was so proud of himself...and seeing his joy made my happiness increase a thousand fold.
I know there will still be stuggles, and he'll always have to try a little harder...but I know he'll be fine....
He started to struggle in school in first grade. I attributed it to him being "immature". By third grade, his self esteem had started to suffer. My daughter is one of those "natural learners". Things come so easily to her. She was that straight A student without even trying. I'd get so heartbroken when he'd come home and I'd ask him how he did on a spelling test, or a math test; and he'd get this huge grin on his face and tell me "I think I did good this time mom!". And invariably, the test would come back with less than stellar results. Report card days were the worst. My daughter would come home with perfect grades. My son, however, would come home depressed and sad, and ask me "do you love Jordyn more because she's the smart one? " "do you love me even though I'm stupid?" I couldn't handle it.
I finally bit the bullet and acknowledged what I had suspected all along. I thought my son might suffer from ADD. I fought it as long as I could. I know so many kids are misdiagnosed, and overmedicated...that I didn't want to be one of "those" mothers that wanted a zombie for a kid, instead of someone a little more spirited. I had him assessed, and spoke at length with his doctor. I wanted him to still be my boy, just my boy who could sit still in class, not play with the insides of his desk drawer while everyone else was listening to the teacher, stay in his seat, keep from blurting out answers, and slow down long enough to focus. His father categorically disagreed with me. He thought his issues could be solved with Tae Kwon Do classes, not medicine. ADD is something that is so often labled as something it's not. However, when you are truly one of those people who try as hard as they can to stick to one task, to not procrastinate, to stay where they're put... We decided on the medicine to try, and with much trepidation, began treating him.
To say that it was night and day was an understatement. My boy that had such focus troubles went from a C/D student, to an A/B honor roll student in 9 weeks time. I'll never forget the look on his face when he brought home that report card. It was like Christmas morning after Santa came. His teacher was amazed at the difference him. We still had our bumps, but it was clear that we were on the right track. He was lucky enough to get an amazing teacher in 4th grade, and when I found out she was moving up to teach 5th grade, I lobbied as hard as I could to get him into her class again. 5th grade found him hitting his stride even more, even as my anxiety started to build at the thought of him going from the warm and fuzzy environment of elementary school, to the dog eat dog world of that purgatory called...Middle School. Middle school meant multiple teachers, switching classes, more homework....this is a boy that I have to remind to brush his teeth and put shoes on before he leaves the house...how on earth can I trust him in middle school???
This boy that I once caught drawing pictures inside all of the picture frame molding, and who scribbled his name in Sharpie marker all over his father's leather couch...tested into Honors level classes in middle school. Anxiety morphed into full fledged panic. Dear Lord....there was no way this kid could do this....
Progress reports came home this week....and to my everlasting shock and surprise, this boy, this child whose potential was locked inside his head while he struggled to get it out...is getting straight A's. I literally cried a little when I found out, because I knew it was always there...it just needed a different doorway to escape from. He was so proud of himself...and seeing his joy made my happiness increase a thousand fold.
I know there will still be stuggles, and he'll always have to try a little harder...but I know he'll be fine....
Oh Melissa...how awesome is that??? YAY Jarrod and YAY Mom...and as Aubrey would say, "YAY God!!"
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